(I know I just posted like 30 min ago, but something just came up)
I never thought I'd find myself in this situation, but yet, I am here. I have a really bad crush on a girl, yet I've agreed to go out an a date with a boy.
Backstory: If you've read my previous entries (specifically the first one), then you've met Kat. She is absolutely adorable and I have the biggest crush on her. I know next to nothing about her, but she just glows in my mind, brighter than anyone I've ever met before. If you read my first post, then you know she told me that she's currently in a relationship ('currently' is her word, not mine). Since that first post, we've talked a little more via text (ughh) and she's been flirty and friended me on fb and invited me to a party she's having while I'm in town. I really don't want to be the 'other woman' and potentially break some girls heart and probably my own as well.
Meanwhile, I'm home in LA and my parents have a guy come to the house one day to fix their computers. I needed some help getting some info off an old harddrive so this guy was helping me out and we actually hit it off. He's cute and smart and nerdy, all good things, and then he asked me out to coffee when I walked him out. I've honestly never dated a guy before, only hooked up at parties and usually got bored. I said sure because I couldn't think of a reason why not.
I am so not the polyamorous type. I really really like Kat, but that's a crush I've had weeks to develop. This guy, Jon, I only met a week ago but I feel like I should be more excited about our impending date. I can't tell if my lack of enthusiasm is because I haven't known him long enough for that excited feeling to develop or if my fondness for Kat is overshadowing it. Maybe I just can't like more than one person at a time.
(Although I distinctly remember crushing pretty hard a male friend of mine while I was with my ex, but that usually only came up when I was mad at her - I never acted on it. Now she's dating him... if you want that story, check out my other blog).
Maybe I'm not excited about dating him because I'm just not into guys, which would also explain my lack of dating men ever. I don't feel the urge to jump his bones like I do around Kat. However, I didn't feel that way about any girls before I started dating one.
Any advice would be much appreciated.
He only asked you for coffee... Go, see what happens and then make a decision. That's my two pennies worth ;)
ReplyDeleteI know it's just coffee, but I feel like I should be more excited than I am. I spent three days thinking about what I was going to wear on my first date with my ex. My chest got tight every time I thought about her. True, I knew her better than I know this guy, but I just feel like I should be feeling some of that.
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